Each fall, thousands working in independent school admissions and placement convene at the annual Enrollment Management Association (EMA) conference to discuss admission and enrollment trends, investigate new approaches to our work, and connect with colleagues across the industry. At this year’s conference in September, I attended sessions presented by a diverse range of institutions on many topics, all of which were thought-provoking and informative. One standout was a panel of college admission deans from highly selective universities discussing their work.  

The panelists represented a wide range of colleges. They were all candid with their thoughts on a variety of topics, including the challenges they have faced such as the recent Supreme Court decision outlawing the use of race as an admission factor unless under strict guidelines and in certain circumstances. The part of the session that drew the most noises of sympathy from the independent school audience, however, was when the deans were asked by the moderator to share what “urban legends” about admission work bother them the most. One of the answers doesn’t veer far from that of admission professionals everywhere: the rumor mill of misinformation about schools and the monetization of the misconstrued concept that there is a “silver bullet” out there that will “get you in.”

One example of this is what one dean half-jokingly referred to as the “One of …” ones, i.e. people who, in sharing information about a school based on their own or someone else’s experience, provide advice or reach conclusions that are not based on fact. An example might look like this: “One of the moms from my son’s soccer team said her son applied to School X four years ago and said it was definitely the interview that got him in so that school obviously really cares about the interview the most.”  A student version might look something like, “One of my friends visited that school and said none of the kids there smiled the entire tour. So, I’m not going to apply.” As the dean noted, there is no doubt that advice in the form of a “One of…” statement is well-intentioned. However, that does not make the person offering the advice a verified source of information, much less information relevant to you.

A variation of this well-intended sentiment is evident on the many “Chance Me Up!” websites, where random participants on open online platforms make predictions on a student’s “chances” to be admitted to schools based on their (or their child’s) admission results. These and other comparable sites have reduced the most important part of the admission process to one singular goal — “getting in” — rather than the more important goal — the self-reflection and investment that the journey, rather than simply the outcome, provides our children.

In a world where outcomes can seem unpredictable, it is understandable that one might turn to “One of…” advice and guidance from strangers on the internet (although haven’t we been teaching our kids for years to avoid strangers on the internet?? But I digress.), or anonymous comments on an online forum to help cut through the noise, even if the information received is solely one person’s opinion. It’s why we all check online reviews before a purchase even though we know they could be AI-generated or from paid reviewers.  It’s also understandable that this behavior would drive admission officers crazy, especially when they see information shared by someone about their school that is factually inaccurate on a website, as I have seen about my school more than once.

However, my former job as a college counselor would not exist if the process of applying to schools were as simple as it used to be. It’s complicated because holistic review naturally requires a comprehensive consideration of each applicant by schools that differ in priorities, mission, and culture. Therefore, we each have a process, and outcomes, which reflect that difference. And because of that complexity, there is nothing wrong with getting help. The school search can feel overwhelming and takes a significant amount of time, especially for families unfamiliar with educational options in the United States or who need help determining what schools might be good fits for them. It can be a good idea to have someone outside of one’s own family providing an objective opinion, and Loomis is not the only school that benefits from the referrals of respected, and highly knowledgeable professionals who work with students applying to Loomis Chaffee. These include community-based organization advisors, school placement counselors, and accredited consulting sherpas who can help guide a family through the minefield that this process can sometimes seem to be.

It's also important to emphasize, though, that while it can be helpful in certain cases to invest in the school search process with reputable outside help, it is not necessary to do so to have a successful admission process. In fact, most prospective students do not and end up just fine wherever they land. Like we tell our students, consider the source when doing research — finding the right ones now will make it less likely you’ll fall victim to “One of…” advice when college research rolls around. And remember, no one can tell you about how you might like a school, or your chances of getting into a school if they do not know everything about who you are, what you are submitting, and what the school is about. (Genuine Admission: one of these professionals contacted me recently and shared he had not been on our campus since 1992. Make sure your sources are up to date.)

So, are the worries of an admission dean at Dartmouth or Harvard or the University of Pennsylvania different than those of Loomis Chaffee? Yes, and no. While we may not have the same volume of applicants or level of scrutiny around the admission process, we are in lockstep in believing that more messaging along the lines of “One of my friends went through this last year and it all turned out fine … and it will for you/your child, too,” would be hugely helpful for anyone involved in the process of applying to schools — especially the young people whose lives are most impacted. A “One of…” one who responded in that way would be a great person to pay close attention to.