Monday Musings from The Kravis Center From Elizabeth Parada, Dean of the Office of Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion
Dear Colleagues:
It was just about a week ago that we learned of the deadly shootings in Atlanta where 8 people lost their lives. Of the 8 people, 7 were women and 6 were Asian. Lest we forget, here are their names:
Soon Chung Park Hyun Jung Grant Sun Cha Kim Yong Ae Yue Delaina Ashley Yaun Paul Andre Michels Ziaojie Tan Daoyou Feng
On Friday we learned of an attack on one of our own community members, a student who identifies as part of the LGBTQ+ community. Both were attacks, and they both originate from hate and bigotry. Several issues arose as I processed this news both internally and with friends and colleagues. There are those who are personally impacted and hurting among us, and there are those for whom these events, while sad, have very little meaning in their lives.
I believe that as educators we are generally gifted with extra empathy genes (science department, please bear with me!). We care for our students, and in an independent school world, even more so as we get to know them so much better. My concern is that as much as we may care, there is a very large gap in addressing the needs of our community when there is no understanding behind the care. If someone were to say to me "I care for you" but I don't have a sense they understand who I am, or they make certain assumptions about me because of my identities, the care being expressed feels hollow. Learning the history, delving into the nuance and complexity of intersectionality, and listening rather than judging are necessary to make that deep connection. The Asians killed in Atlanta were all women and the killer, a white male, and the police chief, another white male, stated that the reason behind the shootings was not about race. The question we must ask is, what forces are at play in American culture that place Asian women in places like massage parlors and nail salons? Terms like exotification, orientalism, objectification and hyper sexualization abound, and those are certainly centered on race. Learning our history is critical, and taking ownership for our complicity in it is a painful but necessary process. I often say that shame and blame, while quick to rise, have no useful purpose in processing these events and in making progress. It may be that for some, those powerful emotions propel them to learn and become better individuals, to take action and stand as allies, and to always question. For most, however, they are paralyzing; if you are experiencing those emotions, question how they are serving you. Perhaps by feeling bad you know you are a good person who understands right from wrong, but are these feelings preventing you from doing better? There may be other reasons, and this is a good opportunity to dive deeper and learn a bit more about yourself.
Our LGBTQ+ community is also very vulnerable. Some choose the freedom to be out, but for many of our queer students the salacious and hypersexualized comments, painful past experiences, and general lack of acceptance prevent them from being out and thus they cannot fully express who they are. I can only imagine what it would be like if I had to constantly pretend to be other than who I am in order to feel safe. Keeping a secret of that magnitude must take so much energy and personal resources! Our Head of School took pains to keep the student's identity private, though it would be unsurprising that many are curious and wondering who it may be and are spending some time and energy trying to put two and two together to identify the individual. Why is it so important to out them? What purpose does it serve other than to satisfy our curiosity and expose them to further attacks? Our school has taken steps to be more inclusive and accepting yet there remains much to be done, and changing a school culture takes a lot of time and effort. I am aware that I make mistakes and sometimes they hurt people. I have to own that and then find ways to make it up and make it better.
Just as our personal work on diversity, equity, inclusion and justice must start with knowing ourselves in order to then make a connection with others, the school must also take a good, hard, and unbiased look at itself. We are about to start a Climate Assessment, conducted by Dr. Derrick Gay, and it will take all of our participation in order to get that real look at who we are. I urge you all to take the time to complete the survey and to check with your advisees, if you have them, to make certain they have completed it as well. The survey is completely anonymous, only Dr. Gay will see the raw data, therefore there is nothing that will identify you- so be honest!
Finally, you are not alone. I am here as dean of DEI to offer you support. Please avail yourself of the resources at hand; after all, as educators we know that no questions are bad questions! The Kravis Center is poised and ready to support you with your lesson plans and ideas for connecting with a broader set of materials and approaches to provide students with greater examples of windows and mirrors in your classrooms. The office of DEI is poised and ready to listen to your needs and concerns and address them as a community. We welcome your questions and your trust in helping us guide us through what may often be tricky terrain. I am grateful for this opportunity to share my thoughts with you.
In solidarity,
Elizabeth Parada
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(The Science of Teaching and Learning) Learning and the Brain Summer Institutes (various dates, depending upon interest)
(The Science of Teaching and Learning) The CTTL Summer Academy, July 26-29, 2021
Helping Teachers Grade More Equitably (various dates available)
The Catalyst Conference | GOA (globalonlineacademy.org), April 22-26, 2021
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